Without a doubt, being kind to others is one of the most noble ways to bring yourself some homegrown happiness. It’s that old adage; it’s better to be beautiful on the inside than on the outside. Any person with a balanced sense of self worth would agree with that, but how do you become beautiful on the inside? Well, the first part in that equation is to be kind to others, that’s a well-known given.
The next part however, is easily overlooked.
It is as important to be kind to yourself as it is to others. If you don’t spend some time and effort in making yourself feel worthwhile, it’s all too easy to snuff that light inside you.
RuPaul says it best:
“If you don’t love yourself, how in the hell you gonna love somebody else, can I get an amen up in here!?”
Amen Ru, amen.
Here are some of the ways that you can focus some of that light inward, and in doing so, blossom into the beautiful person everyone is capable of being.
1. Looks aren’t everything
As I covered up top, being a “beautiful” person doesn’t mean just physically attractive. You know those people you have in your life and when you think of them, you can practically see them glowing in your mind because they’re such a light in your life? That’s the kind of beauty we’re after. And that can’t be found in a mirror. One way that you can be kind to yourself, is to reset some of those unrealistic beauty standards and find a healthy self-image. That means being happy with who you are and what you look like. That’s not to say to not work on staying physically healthy, but it will save you a lot of self-hatred by not relying on the mirror.
2. Take care of yourself.
In relation to the previous point, it’s important to take care of your health, if not for aesthetic reasons, then for your own wellbeing. Eat healthy and nutritious meals. Do regular exercise. Get a good night’s sleep and drink plenty of that elixir of life: clean crisp water. Being confident and comfortable in yourself doesn’t mean not to try to improve your lifestyle. Regular exercise also raises your endorphins and gives you more of that vital energy to focus on yourself or others.
3. Take notes from others.
Whether it’s another’s relationships, or the way someone balances their priorities, watch those around you who seem to be crushing it. There’s no shame in taking notes on other people’s successes, and only ego will stand in your way of doing so. Heck, you can even ask them for advice directly, I’m sure that’ll flatter them and putting your ego aside only does wonders for your mental health.
4. Let go of your baggage.
A wise man once said:
“The past can hurt. But the way I see it, you can either run from it or learn from it.”
Ok, it wasn’t a man…it was a baboon. It was Rafiki from The Lion King. But a wise baboon once said it all the same! This is a vital point in self care as dwelling on the past can keep you stuck there and prevent you from moving on with your life in a constructive way. Remembering key lessons from hard times is important, but otherwise you have to move on with your life.
5. Don’t overthink the little stuff.
We can all spend hours or days obsessing over the elements of our life. Take it a step at a time, do some research, listen to people and at the end of the day you just need to follow your gut. More on that to come. Take the little wins, but don’t overthink either your day-to-day living, or how people are perceiving you.
6. Follow to your heart.
You know that voice in your head? The one that shouts out when you see someone living their best life and traveling the world? Or when you daydream about that alternative career you secretly wish you’d pursued. Well, heck, make it happen! This isn’t always easy (most of the time it’s not!), and often requires some sort of sacrifice like leaving the security of your 9-to-5 to write that book you’ve always had in your brain. But the gamble can result in a greater sense of self worth and the fulfilment of your destiny…so long as you’re prepared to put the work in, that is. But the first step is the decision.
7. Have fun!
This is possibly the most basic piece of advice, but one of the most important. Just have fun! Carve out a little time every day for your hobby, your friends, whatever it is in the world that sparks joy in you. Keeping this time for yourself will remind you that you are important, you are valid and your are worth your own prioritisation.
Do you have any self-love tips?
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